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xtxintong

xtxintong

Friday, 6 November 2020

dull

tonight, i am tired to even write
the lights, they are blurry yet bright
can i return to where i was
where i didn’t need to hide


will i ever return

or will i yearn the same down the road

truth is, i am angry 

the world gave me so much

yet greed engulfs me


what happens when we lose joy?

wishing becomes pointless, 

laughter becomes sinister 

through my lens, i judge the world


silence becomes normal

blankly looking into the horizon; 

all we see is dullness

just one more day, 

that’s what we always say


time passes and becomes everyday 

when i leave, know that i am always grateful

why didn’t i show when i lived?

i don’t know

me at 21 was still struggling


the world seemed smaller

she looked bigger

stronger, they say 

but really, her walls just moved closer

she no longer anticipated

she no longer explored


just when others are living their best

she withered

her youth just started and it was over

“things will be better”

i can’t wait for all these to be over.