奥若拉

走遍了天涯海角 又回到了最傻的我
躺在血滩里 望着奥若拉
幻想坠入你的心里

至給渴求被爱的你 努力披上婚纱的恶魔
同伴笑她讀過童話 还信以为真
天使的存在

承诺是小孩说的谎言 而我相信了小孩
被伤得遍体鳞伤 瘫弱跪着添伤疤
还天真地等待你念魔咒

信仰是可笑的尽头 在星空下坠的夜晚
窒息的我是否还能留住 和你的记忆
试想爱得如此痛苦何为爱

所以我就最后一次 安静的熄灭
我仅剩的一只烟火 还未等到你
说是没期待但陷阱重重

火柴妹妹隐约看见了灯光 至少最后一口气
它是幸福的幻影
就让我继续自私下去 直到我被吞没

hush crush flush

hush little baby we don’t cry

we’ll crush them with every night

I’ll make you flush every bit of feelings down, 

one four six that’s right

now hush before the bag’s open up wide

and crushed that’s the fate of the cat, quick hide

you let it out and I’ll make sure I flush every bit of your throat down,

till your dead mama saves the night

now you know hush your sorrows shut

nobody cares they’ll only crush

they’ll treat you like shit, they’ll only flush, 

watch it swirl fast like art

hush baby those muffled cries

before I crush your bloody eyes

go to your bowl like you always do 

and flush down all of your stupid whys 

last warning I said hush all your witless whines

nothing is gonna be fine

are you crushed with this truth baby?

well don’t be, cause soon you’ll be flushed down with the time

self love;

i never knew learning to self love was something valid;

was i allowed to put down my responsibilities, just so i could find myself?

I’ve always thought: we’re all struggling in this, we are all drowning. 

One day, surely, the water will subside and I’ll be able to breathe.

It’s just a phase, it’s just the tides.

But no, you don’t wait for the water to be calm, you learn to paddle in the water. Self love is something we all have to learn, to survive.

I’ve been putting it off for the longest time; not sure if it was because I didn’t know how to go about it, or I just didn’t like the loneliness I felt while learning to swim in this big, big ocean.

As of now, I’m barely staying afloat. One more wave and I’ll be swept off.

I want to help the people around me, I want to bring them to the shore. I want to love people; but how can I do that when I can’t even save myself?

Self love is essential, self love is important. I’ll learn to fight this tide and I’ll be back for you all. 

Give me time will you? This is for me and all of you. 

Let’s learn together, we’ll eventually get there. I’ll see you all then.

thank you;

i'm beyond grateful
for you who makes my heart full

thank you
for loving me

i'll be back soon

human

'don't i look ugly when i cry?'
i looked up, sobbing

he looked at me, and fondled with my hair lovingly
'no, you look human'

'it's the most human i've ever seen of you'